Moments — Thinking Out Loud

The true beauty in being able to travel to wonderful places is the reminder of the possibilities life holds when revealed through experiencing new cultures and unfamiliar surroundings. Some of my favorite moments come when walking through streets of a new city in the dawn of a fresh morning taking pictures of the people and places I find as I wander. People working, talking and doing everyday activities, are moments I cherish. Me, alone with a camera, a stranger in a city with no language to share, just accepting the gift revealed by observing what is there in front of me. When I talk to students and families about the Academy in my travels abroad I am always amazed at their courage and their curiosity. I’m amazed at their desire to have a better education and I am amazed at the possibilities they see in us, in our school and in our community.

As if often the case, traveling gives me time to read and write. On this trip to Azerbaijan and Kazakhstan I read “Pachinko”, by Min Jin Lee. It is story about a Korean family set during the Japanese occupation of Korea. In this passage, a scene between the boy Solomon and his step-mother Etsuko, there is a moment when she realizes that he can see the good in people. She has been distant to him only getting close as the difficulties with her real estranged daughter come to light. It’s his birthday and they have come from his party. Etsuko says…

“No, no. It’s not that. I’m just so sorry that you might have thought I didn’t want to be your mother”. She clutched her stomach and tried to regulate her breath. “I’ve hurt so many people. And you’re such a good boy, Solomon, I wish I could take credit for you…”

Solomon replies.

“But I was born today, and isn’t it funny how no one gets to remember that moment and who was there? It’s all what is told to you. You’re here now. You are a mother to me.”

Etsuko covered her mouth with her open palm and let his words go through her. Somewhere after being sorry, there had to be another day… The curved brass spout let go its last few drops, and the kitchen grew silent. Etsuko reached over to hold the child on his birthday.

“…and let his words go through her”. This phrase is a such a wonderful description of the moment when we allow someone’s words to affect us. So often when we are in conversation and someone says something nice, something unexpected, we try to speed through the feelings behind the words, perhaps deflecting it with some pleasantry. No doubt Etsuko has done this her whole life, maybe as a protection mechanism, maybe out of shame of the past, but in this moment she “lets his words go through her”. She allows herself to be impacted by his words, she allows them to affect her and to move her toward an embrace of her step-son.

We all have this power. The power to overcome our tendency to make a moment trivial or less awkward. We have the power to allow ourselves to feel that which is there in the words to be felt. I hope that you think of this passage when the moments come this break, as you know they will. They will come from proud parents, or doting aunts, siblings, cousins or from friends who have truly missed you. You will have that chance to let someone’s thoughts and words move you. My wish for you during this holiday break is that you cherish those moments and let the words pass through you too.